But the truth is that in spite of the foodies that we are, we both haven't cooked good meals in quite sometime now. A left for India in August and spent a month at my parents' eating my mom's food and helping her cook (She is touched, shocked, amazed and rather happy -since she hates cooking :P)
I had the most hectic summer semester with classes and enough readings to last me a lifetime. I'm currently in the Fall semester and finally settled down. Today, I spoke to A for a long time after a long time. Its funny how we haven't had a heart-to-heart conversation in ages now. And we are husband and wife. Yes. Still. I've had people either expecting me to cry at the drop of a hat missing him. Or, there are feminists who think that I should totally be nonchalant about my relationship status and act like he doesn't exist. Sorry to disappoint you, folks. I'm in the middle somewhere. I miss him terribly every single time I eat. Because he cooked most of the time and I just ate. Now I have to cook and eat. And every single time I have to clean the house. I'm only used to supervising and now I have to do it myself. Albeit, it is being done once in 3 months.
Today, during our lengthy conversation, he was talking of returning to cooking now that he's settled in his own apartment. He said he'd been trying to bake bread and cookies for a week now and every attempt was a failure. I was quite surprised. He is a master baker. He may make mistakes, but they don't repeat. I spoke of how I've been planning forever to make bread and never got around to doing it. I told him how I went to our favourite food blogs and kept telling the blogger am going to try their latest recipe, buy the ingredients but never end up making it. We laughed saying we've become lazy.
Suddenly, he banged his fist and I had a tear rolling down my cheek. Its no fun anymore. Before getting married, I couldn't identify one Dal from another. And he'd cook the usual, sabzi, chawal, dal, sambar. Nothing special. Ours was an arranged marriage. We fought every single day until we got married and after we got married. We've had a turbulent time together. Except for food. Until we discovered how much we liked food and cooking and eating. We took our own sweet time getting to know each other and it was hell until we figured it out.
I knew I'd miss him and he'd miss me. I mean, who doesn't miss their spouse when you're away from them, right? And we were ready for the heartache and what not. But this is something else! I just can't seem to make anything more than random one pot meals or worse, Maggi noodles for dinner. While he is struggling with basic cooking and baking in spite of spending on a new kitchen with all the equipment. It struck us today that its going to be a bad year for our foodie-selves. He said he'd not made Pasta in ages while I thought of the rotting pasta in the fridge. That is his favourite meal. I haven't made Vethe Kuzhambu in ages while he has it often. My favourite meal.
I broke down after a long time. Ever since things have been working - read university admits, job in India etc, I've not worried about anything. Today was something else. I was scared I will never eat good food again. Ya, I'm like that. I get scared about missing out on food. You can safely call me a lunatic now.
Then the calm voice spoke ( certainly not me, it was him!). We figured it out. Its going to take us time to come back to this blog and write about the joys of eating. Right now, we're hardly cooking anything much. And for those of you whose recipes I've bookmarked, I promise I will get to it sometime. Or, maybe we will. In a year or so. And credit you too.
Please bear with us. We are humans after all, though I know I seemed like I was a super woman. I assure you, I'm not. And he has never been a super man. So there.